who won?!

MORE Die Hard Trivia!

"Little" Agent Johnson - Grand L. Bush ("I was in Junior High, dickhead.") has been in Airwolf, Incredible Hulk, CHiPs, Fame(!), Police Squad! ("roses are red, violets are blue - I'm gonna smash yer face in"), Murder, She Wrote (can he GET any better?!), Renegade (quality teevee!), Walker - Texas Ranger (WOWEEE!), and Nash Bridges (Cheech?! a COP?!) to name but a few! WOW.

Wot a feckin STAR.

And movies?! I've seen him in quite a few (even a James Bond!), but check some of these out - Brewster's Millions (don't remember that one..), Lethal Weapon (remember that one - just another nameless background cop), Licence To Kill (tol-ja), Leathel Weapon 2 (I guess he made an impression..), Street Fighter (!!! Balrog !!!), Maniac Cop 3 (there's a reason for mentioning this one.. be patient), and not forgetting - Secret Agent 00 Soul - WOW again!

Let's check the other Agent - Robert Davi ("just like Saigon, right Slick?"): oooh - it's a close call on the tv shows; Incredible Hulk, Charlie's Angels, TJ HOOKER (!!!), Hart To Hart (wow - I remember that show.. scary..), The Fall Guy, St. Elsewhere, Hill Street Blues, THE A-TEAM (I do NOT remember that one!!), The Equalizer (oh, you cool bastard..), and not forgetting a voice in Batman Beyond.

Impressive, no?
No?
Yes.

On to the movies; now we all remember him as the main bad guy in Licence To Kill - also with "Little" Johnson! (heheh.. little johnson... "you get us the money, Lebowski - or we cut off your johnson!!"); The Goonies (!yeah!), Raw Deal (possibly one of the worst Arnie movies ever. And there's a LOT to choose from.. ever see the Megadrive game? side on walking beat em up. only all you can do is move left or right and punch.. eeeesh..), Licence To Kill (of course), Maniac Cop 2 & 3 (seee? I told you there was a reason for mentioning MC 3 earlier..), Predator 2 (rrrrrrreally?!), Peacemaker (aka Pacemaker.. zzzZZzzzZZz), Showgirls (what a classy dude), ... and that's about it for movies I've heard of.. but wait 'til 2003 when Robert Davi is in - The Hot Chick!! Not necessarily literally, but has a role in The Hot Chick..

Again, not literally.. hopefully.. although that'd make for entertaining viewing.. or is that just me?.. hmm..

Die Hard Trivia;

• The actor (Anthony Peck) who plays 'young cop' in Die Hard - "something about a double-cross" later plays the cop 'Ricky Walsh' in Die Hard with a Vengeance.
• This was based on a book entitled "Nothing Lasts Forever which was a sequel to another book entitled "The Detective", which was made into a film starring Frank Sinatra. Bruce Willis made his movie debut in First The Deadly Sin (1980) walking out of a bar as Sinatra walks into it.
• The scene in which Gruber and McClane meet was inserted in to the script after Alan Rickman (Hans Gruber) was found to be proficient at mimicking American accents. The filmmakers had been looking for a way to have the two characters meet prior to the climax and capitalized on Rickman's talent.
• The teddy bear given by Bruce Willis to his daughter was later used in director John McTierman's Hunt for Red October
• In the movie Midway (1976) James Shigeta (Joseph Takagi) was the Japanese admiral of the Aircraft Carrier "Akagi". The vault computer screen shows the character's name as "Akagi". Probably a reference to this role.
• The script, by Steven E. DeSouza, was originally his script for the sequel to "Commando", but he altered the story once Schwarzenegger dropped out.(!!!!)
• The German that the terrorists speak is sometimes grammatically incorrect and meaningless. In the German version of the film, the terrorists are not from Germany but from "Europe".
• Also Hans and Karl have been renamed to Jack and Charlie. In the scene where McClane writes down the names Hans and Karl on his forearm, we hear him say. "I'm gonna call you Hans and Karl, just like the 2 evil giants in the fairy tale." Later on, he still refers to them as Jack and Charlie.

Cool, huh? :p

Smile, Carl...

Hello, this is Agent Johnson ........ *sigh* ........ no, the other one.


I wanted this to be professional. Efficient, adroit, cooperative, not a lot to ask. Alas, your Mr. Takagi did not see it that way, so he won't be joining us for the rest of his life.

yippie ki ay

Wow. Ok. Moved house, and MY GOD is it stressful.
BUT - I managed to get a parking ticket on the rental van and get a BIG orange sticker on the window saying it was authorised to be clamped and/or removed...

Then I smashed the passenger wing mirror a bit after a little ding with a big metal bin. The scratches on the van could be hidden, but that mirror needed replacing if I was ever going to see my deposit back.. Thus Gheez hatched the greatest plan since a small Austrian said "yeah, fuck it - let's invade Poland. Who's gonna notice anyway?" - let's nick a mirror off another transit van and replace it..

GEEEEEEEEEEENIUS!!

Only he nicked the driver side mirror off of one van, broke one when removing it from another, nicked another broken one and another semi broken one. We replaced it (having done a few laps of the rental place, van hunting.. after a while transit vans became little more than targets... heheh...), and made sure to stand in front of the mirror when the guy checked the van over upon returning it.

Hey - they have a glove box with two or three spare wing mirrors in it - what more could they want?! An unscratched van?!

Well, yeah. maybe an unscratched van. But not much else!

Ahhhh wheee. What fun.

Anyway - I only have a few more minutes left here in this luverly Norf Lundun 'Net Café, so I'll say cheerio.







cheerio.

the biggest one you can find!

How many tomatoes can you balance on your knee?

No!! Not everyone leaves - Sinatra's still with us! Still strong, still alive! Have hope - like Sinatra does. Have faith - like Sinatra does. have chips n gravy.
Like I do.

Don't make me sing Shakespeare's Sister at you. If only cos I can't remember the words.

Don't goo-oooo-ooooo awaaaa-aaaaaaaaaaaaaa-yyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Yeah.

Ah pidy da foo.

Now go drink some milk and return to us afresh.

In case you hadn't noticed, we're now on episode 3 of The Critically Acclaimed Ned n Dez Show - there's trouble in paradise; can the duo contain their anger and hatred for each other in the name of entertainment?!

You knows? Yooouu deciiiide..

What a dick...

I'm never going to get any work done now. Not since Superdog sent me my birthday gift known only as Super Duper V2.0 - a cd FULL of SNES games! More than EVER BEFORE!! They rule! I've been trying to find Chaos Engine for ages; one of my all time favourite Amiga games, and I was unaware it had been released on the Snes - been playing that lots...

It's a wunerful collection and is presented just soo darned well with a website styleee interface - hey; maybe we can start selling em thru Jollyboyz? If anyone would be interested in this peice of modern history (!), email me so I can rub my hands in money-loving, Scrooge McDuck style glee.

Quack.

I'm gonna go into it in more detail over on ChainsawJoe.com, but if any of all y'all are gonna be in london between now and September 15th, spend £11 to see the Game On exhibition as the Barbican... the history of video games with over 150 games to play!! yay!! :o)

Bllleeeeerrrgghhh..

Last night was everso-slightly superb! That mad beeatch screaching her mad bitch ass off, busting a window, Skuff shouting stuff like "You can get free proffesional help - it's a freephone number you demented COW", us cracking up all the while the cops are pulling up and the guy whose window was busted storming over to us to blame us!

A very drunk MGK managed a superb effort of 1) calming the rather irate citizen down and 2) explaining to everyone what happened. All this time I'm munching on a giant kebab, offering some to anyone who passes, waving at residents who're trying to see what's going on and my finest moment - when a car screeches it's tyres having sped it's way up to the cops and suddenly slowed down when seeing them, and I'm start shouting "NICK'IM! NICK 'IM! Bad boy bad boy - whatcha gonna do?!" just before one cop actually pulls the guy over and nicks him!

HAHAHAAAAAAAA!!! The power of the JOE IS ULTIMATE!! WHAHAHAHAAAAA!!

Bye.

Oh dear, oh dear. Ned n Dez have been running amok, and as such I decided to quarantine them in the padded cell of Jollyboyz.com known as The Critically Acclaimed Ned n Dez Show (see the menu bar at the top and bottom there).

Let's hope they can keep their rabid drool in that airtight container instead of infecting the rest of the web...

Hi. I don't really have a lot to say right now. I just thought that this thing that I created here was getting a bit out of hand. I feel a bit like Dr Frankenstein, watching his loved creation run amok in a small rural village, inhabited with innocent, but dangerously over-opinionated and xenophobic folk, each suffering from a couple of brain cells short of a pair.

I'm watching, agast, as my creation selectively chooses the ripe, young villagers one by one, and strips their skin off like a bunch of pink, spotty bananas, before chewing them up and spitting their bones in a pile for use in an arcane arts and crafts fair later in the season.

Terrible.

See the kinda shit I have to put up with in this crazy town?! Great, innit?!

I have never - in all my days - encountered such INSOLENCE..

Welcome to my world... won't you come on in..

YES!! That's the kind of intellekchooowal stuff I wanted on here! Way to go guys!
And if you find out about Carol - lemme know... heheh.. :p

The day after the morning following the day before... the afternoon... uhh...

yeeeaahh...
Anyway..

Okay. The beer evaporated (although there's about one or two SHITLOADS remaining.. approx. To 1 decimal place..), the floor has an interesting "anti-gravity" quality to it... (ie. we could turn the house upside down and still stay quite comfortably on the floor..), the socks are in the pond (?!), a phone is M.I.A., all the booze in the paddling pool have lost the labels, so we've invented a booze "lucky dip".. either you get beer (bottle o' brown booze).. or a girly woosy girly drink - NNOOO!!
Girly.

There was more stuff. I think. But I can't remember much else...
Ow.

Head hurts...

But no Fatalities this year! YAY!! :o)

Hooo mamma... the joints a-flowing the "bobbing for bud" has begun (aithankyou), the sun is a-scorching and the beer is a-going!

Get yer bootaies this-a-way!! :p

ahahahaaaaa!!
The pool is full of beer, ice and beer, the sun is O-U-T (out), the cigars are a-glowing, the rizlas are a-rustling and the dope is a-schmokin.

YEAH!!

To all of yas not here - get yer butts up Ippy way!! :o)

Greetings!!
The pool is half filled with boooooze and it's so hot the balloons are alll a-poppin!

wheeeee!! :o)

Checklist:

• Padding pool - inflated
• Padding pool - over-inflated
• Paddling pool - gasffer taped to allow for over inflation and over filling

hahah.

• Balloons... who cares...
• Beer - started!
• Party - imminent

:o)